S is for Sensible, That's Good Enough for Me

If we ever write a book on the 4 S's (see previous blog post), there would most definitely be a sub-heading underneath "Smart" that would be entitled "Sensible." Dictionary.com defines sensible as "having, using, or showing good sense or sound judgment." I recognize that based on our upbringing and life experiences, our understanding and perception of the world around us and how things should be will differ from one person to the next. Moreover, I acknowledge that as a result of such differences, people often maintain varying preferences and desires that not only guide their everyday decisions, but also navigate much bigger decisions that one must make over the course of a lifetime. In sum, we all have our "ideals."

It has been my unfortunate experience to come across many a young ladies here at BYU that seem to be so adamantly attached to their vision of the ideal life that they regrettably become inflexible and act quite insensibly. With regards to S standing for sensible, I might have even another sub-heading that I would entitle "Supple." Concerning flexibility, I would like to mention the concept of where one raises their family. I am aware that the majority of students here at BYU, particularly the women, speak so highly of their hometown that it is their preference for where they would want to raise their family. I find no fault in such a desire. I love where I grew up and if it worked out that I was able to raise my family there, well that's great.

However, the downside of all of this is seen when the particular girl is so set on this "ideal" of raising her family where she was raised that she seems to push all sensibleness aside. She forgets to realize that 1) her family should follow the will of the Lord in making such decisions and 2) maybe the will of the Lord is for her family to be raised somewhere else. I firmly believe that the Lord wants us to have preferences and make the best decisions we can based on such desires. Notwithstanding, I know that He ultimately desires that we seek His will in all things, including where we live and raise our families. Consequently, shouldn't would be flexible in our approach to the future and where we will raise our families?

I recently sat down in the CougarEat with a particular "friend" of mine who is of the female-sort. As we sat and talk, she informed me of how she couldn't imagine raising her family anywhere but Utah. She was born and raised in Utah. She explained her reasoning in that this is where all of her family lives, this is where she always has lived, this is where she is happy, and she can't imagine living somewhere else away from her family and being happy. Upon hearing this, I found it completely reasonable and understandable that she would have such an "ideal" future in mind for her family. However, as the conversation continued, I became aware of how stubborn she was concerning this matter. She couldn't imagine the Lord asking her to live somewhere else, nor could she imagine her husband wanting to live somewhere else either. Ultimately, she came across as completely inflexible concerning this matter.

Maybe it sounds harsh, but to me, it was really a turn-off. This one particular experience is just an example of the many girls I have met here at BYU who feel the same way. I think it's great to have preferences, but c'mon people! Where is the flexibility?

All I have to say is that S is for sensible, and that is surely good enough for me.